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Three times per year Howe-Peterson conducts a six-week grief support series.  Our fall session begins Tuesday September 21st, for children ages 5 to 12, and Tuesday September 28th, for adults and teens ages 18 and older.

These groups meet from 6:30 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. at Hope Lutheran Church, located at 3640 Madison (at Carlysle) in Dearborn.  To register or for more information please call 313-561-1500.

There are several ways you can prearrange for a funeral and still get Medicaid.  How much money you can protect and for whom depends on which arrangement(s) you choose.

 Effective June 1, 2010, the Irrevocable Funeral Contract Limit will decrease from $11,450 to $11,393.  Remember that the irrevocable cap is reduced by any life insurance funded funeral already assigned to pay for the Medicaid applicant’s funeral. 

 Funds in an irrevocable prepaid funeral contract are unavailable and thus are not counted as assets.  Also note that all monies certified irrevocable by the Department of Human Services are not refundable, but are 100% transferable to another funeral establishment upon request of the preneed owner or upon death, by next-of-kin.

 If someone arranges for services and/or merchandise that exceeds the irrevocable limit, a separate contract (Burial Space Exclusion) can be drawn up and still allow a person to receive Medicaid benefits.  The Burial Space Exclusion items are defined as those items dealing specifically with the burial space:  burial plot; crypt; headstone, monument, or plaque; burial vault; burial clothes; opening/ closing of the grave; flowers for the grave.  The person qualifying for Medicaid can also purchase burial space items for qualifying family members.

 We can assist you with your Medicaid matters and help preserve as much of your assets as possible.

Many more people are choosing cremation today than in the past. People tend to have strong opinions one way or the other. For some the thought of being buried is not appealing. For others the thought of being cremated makes them uneasy. Either option can go against spiritual philosophy. It really comes down to personal preference.

One would think that the most basic difference between burial and cremation is obvious – using one method you are cremated, using the other you are buried. However, even if you are cremated someone will have to decide where your cremated remains will go. The decision will remain whether or not to be buried. Some family members need a place to visit (like a cemetery), others may find that thought morbid, and both of these opinions can run in the same family.  

If you are not buried or placed in a niche at a cemetery, what will happen with your cremains? Being cremated allows the option of having multiple urns so immediate family members can have their own. There is beautiful jewelry that can hold a small portion of the cremains, or the cremains may be scattered over your favorite place. 

Whatever choice is made it is beneficial if you share your thoughts with family members. That way your loved ones will know what you would like and won’t have to presume during a time that is typically fraught with stress and confusion.

I often tell our staff what tremendous opportunities we have to impact people’s lives. We have the opportunity at Howe-Peterson to serve families in their greatest need, to care for them and their most prized possession, their loved one. We have the opportunity through our community work to reach out and touch people’s lives also, or even sometimes our own lives are impacted. I am a member of the Exchange Club of Dearborn and my life was impacted today.

I am working on a project through the Exchange with Child’s Hope, the Child Abuse Prevention Council of Wayne County. They offer programs for Mandated Reporting Training for professionals in our community, Never Shake a Baby to teach parents about Shaken Baby Syndrome, Don’t Stress Take 5 a workshop to teach parents how to manage stressful situations and disciplining children, My Body is Mine for preschoolers to learn about inappropriate touching and IMPACT a preschool literacy program. I also came into contact with Sharon Ottenbreit; she is a two time “Teacher of the Year” in Dearborn. Sharon wrote a book based on a true story of a little girl coming into her class with her much loved teddy bear. The little girl was asking for help finding a new home for “Teddy” because her family was entering into a homeless shelter and she was only allowed to bring one toy, she had chosen to take “Dolly” which her grandmother had given her and she needed a new home for “Teddy”. This was a heart wrenching story; it literally moved me to tears.

The impact on me was the realization of the needs in our communities. We all know these are tough economic times; people have lost jobs, homes and families. But, the simple needs in our communities of simple items like diapers for the food banks and shelters at the rate of thousands per month. The need not only to donate money for those diapers or the diapers themselves but the need for volunteers to drive them to those food banks and shelters is overwhelming. The children of our schools who have raised money by selling their own toys to help others in need at the local homeless shelter are to be admired for they are learning at such a young age the meaning of community. We have people in our community like Annemarie Valdez and Sharon Ottenbreit who are impacting people’s lives everyday through their work and their passion. Please help support them in your thoughts or prayers and any other way you may.

I just ask you, have you impacted someone’s life today?

Tim Schramm

Funerals are an important ritual that can actually start the healing process.  Even if the deceased has chosen cremation there can still be a viewing and visitation/service before the cremation.  Funerals are not for the benefit of the deceased, but for the ones who are left behind.  They allow family and friends to begin to deal with their loss by sharing their thoughts and feelings.  Their support offers continuity and hope to the mourners.  It creates a safe haven for the loved ones to express their grief and share memories, honoring and validating the life of the deceased.

In these times where the trend leans towards wanting to get things over with quickly, and wanting to avoid mourning, we forget that avoiding a funeral is not going to shield us from our grief.  Hearing stories about how a loved one touched other lives can be a great comfort as we accept our loss.

When we care about someone who passed away or their family members, we need to show our support by physically being there, to let them know that they are not alone in their grief.